“I’m having a bad day” is proclaimed far too often and at inopportune times … like while we’re waiting to be served in some capacity. It’s typically issued as a waiver, an excuse of the intolerable behaviour to which we will soon be subjected. Great. And all I wanted was a coffee, black, no creme, no sugar, no attitude.
The statement pleas for permission to be miserable (only persons suffering from weakened mental or physical health are entitled). It’s a free pass to vent and spew and whine and complain. It’s the green light to mistreat others; to be intolerant and impatient; to feel sorry for your woeful existence; to focus on the bad in life; and to put others on alert to tread carefully permitting any obnoxious behaviour to be tolerated. There. I think I covered it all.
Yet on the positive side it does let us know your true feelings and prepares us for any snarly outburst. It forewarns us to be mindful of your mood, walk away or at least trod gingerly, all to avoid any spillage from your unnecessary explosives.
But do you really want others to worry about how you might behave? Sure it gives you their attention but is it a healthy balanced relationship when others walk on egg shells fearful of your foul mood?
The problem is once we get into that mindset we get trapped and believe it’s a valid excuse for all the toxins we might emit. These brief periods in our life should be just that … brief. And if possible left to enjoy in our own company.
Truly having a bad day? Steal time away from your world to wallow in your own misery. Dredge it all up for one sitting and eat alone. Write about it. Scream. Cry. Rant. Rave. Heck, you can even blog about it. Then when you feel the mood might be passing, exhale the cathartic “PHTT” (hand movements used to punctuate the expression are extremely satisfying) and let it go before you infect those around you.
And if that doesn’t work for you, take the focus off yourself and turn it on the people around you. You will soon stop feeling sorry for yourself and recognize you are not the only one fighting the battle or challenged with the daily drama we all face.
Strategies to deal with ‘IHABD-ers’ is to ignore them; remove yourself from their company altogether; or if you are bold enough to hit them face on (not physically of course … well wait a minute … maybe if it’s warranted) and declare “ok you’ve got 10 minutes to get it out of your system. Then I don’t care to hear any more of it.” Unless of course you choose to be an understanding, empathic, active listener and allow them to consume your time and energy. That’s fine as long as you’re wearing your armour.
But if they are in a front-line, customer service position or one offering training, teaching or treatment they must be reminded “sorry but your ‘bad day’ is not acceptable. Considering the number of individuals you will be in contact with today, perhaps it would have been best you called in ‘grumpy’ and kept your germs to yourself~!!~”